Part 10: Is there a reason my bodyguard's gone missing?

(Author's note: So today I've got back-to-back episodes. Yay. Not. Weeeee... Yesterday...er, two days ago Tyler got kidnapped, bla bla bla.........and now Wilbo's going to do something and they're all gonna dance. Not. I dunno. Thinking of a movie plot.....and I don't have one. Oh well. It shall be possibly not really a tad original...without a movie plot. Hehehe. Actually, I'll have to take a rain check on two episodes. I've already been on for a while.)

Stolen Movie Plot: "Pirates of the Caribbean" reference, and some "LOTR" plot material (there'll be much more as the story progresses), "Hulk" stuff...

Special Guest Star: Will Smith again. He doesn't get a picture.

Natalie was just walking when she saw Wilbo behind a potted plant. She knelt down to talk to him.
"Um...Wilbo? What are you doing?" Wilbo ignored her question.
"Isn't this a great party?"
"Uh, sure, Uncle Wilbo. Have you seen Tyler?" Wilbo frowned.
"Who's Tyler?" He thought a moment. "Oh...isn't he that rude fellow that nice Pete boy was looking for?" Natalie's eyes widened in horror.
"Pete was looking for Tyler?"
"Yes, he was. Would you like a drink?" Natalie grabbed her uncle by the scruff of the neck like a rabbit.
"NO, I DO NOT WANT A DRINK! I WANT to know where Tyler is!!" Wilbo quivered in fear.
"I don't know." Natalie lowered him to the floor.
"Sorry, uncle. Actually, I don't drink, but I'd like to buy you one." She rummaged through her purse. While doing this, the shiny ring she'd received fell to the floor. Bilbo watched it fall. He picked it up and looked at it. Natalie held out her hand.
"May I have my ring back?" Wilbo shrugged.
"Sure." Natalie was surprised. She'd expected resistance and maniacal laughter. Wilbo stared at something in her purse. Natalie looked into it. "What are you staring at?" She saw something glinting and pulled out a very shiny gold credit card. "Wha? This doesn't belong to me!" Wilbo rubbed his hands together greedily.
"Ooooooh...I'd been wondering where that went..." Natalie held it out to him.
"Is this yours?" Wilbo nodded eagerly.
"Yes...yessssss it'sssss mine...my precioussssssss..." He lunged for it. Suddenly, a gunshot rang out. Agent A and the man in the black cloak who'd been stalking Natalie in the mall dropped from the ceiling. Wilbo clutched his heart.
"Hey...I'm not dead!" Then he stared at Agent A. "You SHOT me!" Agent A grinned.
"That's right." Natalie was in shock.
"Is there a reason he's not dead?" Suddenly, Black Cloak man grabbed the ring and ran away laughing. Now Natalie was scared. "WHAT'S GOING ON?" She was on the verge of tears. Agent A put away his gun.
"That man is a certified Lord of the Rings freak. He tried to buy the genuine One Ring from the movie...one of them, at least...but he lost to your uncle...who bought it with..." He paused dramatically. "The One Credit Card." Music from the "The Return of the King" cartoon started playing.
The Bearer of the Ring, the Wearer of the Ring
Some orcs started smashing the speakers to pieces. Agent A shot one. The orcs glared at him.
"We want REAL music!" Another song from the "ROTK" cartoon started playing. The orcs smiled in satisfaction (the song was about them) and scampered away.
Where there's a whip *whip sound* there's a way. Where there's a whip *whip sound* there's a way. Where there's a whip (we don't wanna go to war today!)
Agent A put an arm around Natalie's shoulders and led her away from everybody else, who was dancing to this new strange song. He held up the shiny gold credit card.
"This credit card was made by Elmo 2 months ago in a credit card making factory." Not exactly Tolkien. Natalie blinked.
"Elmo? What does he have to do with this?" Agent A put the credit card in his pocket.
"More than you know. But anyway, this credit card was different because you could buy anything you wanted and never lose any money. The same for anyone who used it. Some said it was magic. But the more you buy, the more this horrible weapon of distruction consumes you." Wilbo ran over, pawing at Agent A's clothes.
"NO!!!!! GIVE ME MY CREDIT CARD!!!! MY PRECIOUSSSS!!!!" He started to cry. Natalie picked up her uncle and gave him to the first person she saw.
"Here...buy him a drink." The random person obliged. Agent A waved goodbye.
"Farewell, Natalie. Here, take care of this credit card. But don't use it." Natalie thought for a moment.
"If you don't want me to use it, why are you giving it to me?" Agent A smiled.
"It's a temptation the viewers of this soap were anticipating, and now the show is better because they know there's a chance you might use it." Natalie paused again.
"Then why are there only 4 people that read this?" Agent A's smile vanished.
"Just keep the card." He did a secret agent thing (which is, of course, secret) and left out a hole in the window. Moxie came over.
"Oh, THERE you are, Natalie. Hey, what's that?" She'd noticed the One Credit Card. Natalie hid it behind her back.
"Um...nothing?" Moxie glared at her. Her skin had a greenish tinge and she looked like she was about to explode.
"You're making me angry...you won't like me when I'm angry."
Camera: *cuts to the frog sitting on top of her head*

* * * *

Tyler awoke to find himself in a garage. There was a Hostess truck parked beside him (*wink wink* Think past episodes). In front of him stood the five members of Simple Plan. Pierre smiled maliciously.

"Ah, I see you're awake." Tyler nodded.

"Yes. I am awake. Now take me back to the club." Pierre laughed evilly.

"MWAHAHAHAHA! You really think I'm going to do that? Noooo...I need you." Tyler rubbed his short hair. Someone had taken his hat.

"You don't need me. You want Moxie. Yeah, that's right, I heard you talking with Pete." Pierre laughed again. The other Simple Plan-ers laughed too.

"You fool. I WANTED you to hear me, so you would THINK I wanted Moxie, which is what Pete thought I wanted, but I need you."

"May I ask why, again?" Pierre shook his head.

"It's all part of my elaborate plan. Now sing for us." Tyler clapped his hands over his mouth and shook his head. Pierre sneered at him.

"Oh, you won't talk, eh?" He motioned to the other guys and they seized Tyler. "Well, then we'll make you sing." They dragged him to a door and opened it, pushing him through. Tyler nearly tripped and found himself on a stage....in front of thousands of screaming fans.

"WE WANT SIMPLE PLAN! WE WANT SIMPLE PLAN! WE WANT SIMPLE PLAN!" Then they saw Tyler. Tyler gulped. This did not bode well.