Part 21: I will give you my groceries if you make this baby shut up.

(Author's note: I kind of liked yesterday's. G. I. Joe's are nice. I am destined to wear a dark blue prom dress. Sweeeeeet... What? Or, to quote Victor, VHAT? Oh, sorry. But yeah. I'm kind of stalling. I forgot what I was going to do today. Something about Ashes and wolf dogs. Wait for me...while I STALL! OMG LOL! This is the real moral of the Little Mermaid. Little Mermaid: Blatently disobeying all your figures of authority gets you hot guys. )

Stolen Movie Plot: "Willow", um...uh...?"The Fellowship" when Elrond's telling that interesting little story

Note: No one was hurt in the making of this soap.

Thousands of elf troops approached Ashes feminist castle, bows at the ready, led by Dole, Krillin, and Garbanzo, who was now wearing limited edition LOTR elf garb, bought off Ebay. The three of them held more advanced weaponry. The National Guard and the Air Force flew overhead. Ashes stood in front of her evil castle, smiling. Dole stopped marching and glared at her.
"Why are you smiling?" Ashes' smile grew wider.
"Cuz I KNOW SOMETHING YOU DON'T KNOW!" Krillin pointed his gun at her.
"Later, babe." The audience laughed momentarily at his use of the word 'babe'. Then he stopped. "And...what is it that you know that we don't know?" Ashes let out a heinous cackle.
"THIS!!!!!!" She held out her hand, showing them all the engagement ring. The elves said, "Ooooh, pretty." Then she plucked off the stone and set it on fire, revealing firey letters. The elves gasped. So did Garbanzo.
"So...that ring I stole from Natalie was really THE ONE RING?" He shook his fist. "THE RING SHOULD'VE BEEN MINE!" Everyone stared at the British Italian.
"YOU WERE BLACK CLOAK MAN?" Screamed the dedicated and enthusiastic readers (*cough cough*). Garbanzo's eyes glinted with fire? MY DESCRIPTIONS SUCK.
"Yes, but I gave it to you, Ashes, because I thought you loved me!" Ashes started crying.
"I DO, GARBANZO!" Garbanzo started.
"Really?"
"No. Being evil's just too much fun! Speaking of which..." She flung her arm to the west. Half of the elves flew away like they'd been picked up by a giant hand and thrown (don't worry, they landed on giant mats offscreen). Ashes waved her arm the other way. The other elves flew away...yeah. Garbanzo shook his head.
"This has got to end." He charged her...and got owned. Dole and Krillin watched in horror.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Ashes smiled as Garbanzo's body crumpled to the ground. The boys ran over to their father. Garbanzo winked.
"Don't worry, kids. I'm only PRETENDING to die." Krillin slapped his father upside the head (how rude).
"This was supposed to be a climactic scene!" Dole took his father's limited edition Anduril.
"I must kill Ashes now." Krillin grabbed the sword.
"No, I wanna do it!" "You always get to do everything!" "You're older!" The boys started fighting over the sword. Suddenly, it flew out of their grasp to cut off Ashes' finger. Ashes screamed.
"NOOOO NOT MY RING AAAAAAAAH!" She ran away crying. The ring was still stuck on her bloody finger. Dole and Krillin shook their heads.
"I refuse to touch it." Garbanzo rose, clutching his side.
"Well...now I know. The wedding is off. I wouldn't marry her if she gave me all of Europe." Ashes came out of the castle.
"Hey, I technically own Europe...but you can have it if you want." Garbanzo's eyebrows rose. The twins shook their heads frantically.
"No, Dad, don't do it, don't do it!" But Garbanzo was smiling. They fell to their knees.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

* * * *

Moxie clutched Sean Preston to her chest, muffling the baby's never ending commentary. The wolf dogs were right at her heels. She screamed. Suddenly, the creepy wolf dogs stopped and fell in a hole. Moxie stopped running.

"Whoa...how so like 'The Village' was THAT?" Natalie grabbed her friend's arm, gasping for breath.

"Whoa...that was...quite...a chase...we almost...got eaten." She fell to the ground, still gasping. Victor climbed out of the tree he had taken refuge in.

"That vas close. Let's rest for a little vhile." They all sat down. Sean Preston was still talking.

"I am very hungry, Mommy. Would you give me something to drink?" Moxie rolled her eyes.

"I'm not your mommy."

"Yes, you are, mommy. May I have something to drink?" Moxie grunted.

"No, I don't have anything for you to drink." The baby nestled against her chest.

"All right, Mommy. Even if I starve to death, I will not even cry." Victor pinched his nose.

"I think the baby is wet..." Natalie glared at SP.

"Why didn't you tell us?"

"I said even if I am wet, I will not even cry." Victor took him from Moxie.

"I vill go change him in the woods." The girls looked apprehensive, but Victor was already gone, chatting with SP. Natalie had a premonition that she refused to share with anyone.

"This doesn't feel right..." Suddenly, she slapped her cheek.

"OUCH! Something poked me!" Moxie felt it too.

"Ouch!" She looked up and saw a hawk fly by, carrying Sean Preston, who was not even crying. There was a scary 1 inch person riding it, screaming, "I STOLE THE BABY! I STOLE THE BABY!" Moxie groaned.

"Come on, Natalie, we have to save SP while being attacked by midgets." They started running after the hawk. Suddenly they fell in a hole. How descriptive was THAT?

(Yeah. More Willow tomorrow. And stuff. OOOR maybe I'll summarize what's happened so far. YEAH. I'll do that.)